We spend a majority of our time relying on other people's time. Making plans, setting dates, marking our calendars, creating group chats, booking trips, planning late night Sunday Zoom calls, and carving parts of our lives so that it molds with others. Life wouldn't be sweet if we didn't plan our winter break family reunions or uphold our Sunday brunch traditions. Everything revolves around time. Since we've all spent time staying at home and finding ways to cope from our bedrooms, I've come to re-evaluate the way that I let other people's time dictate whether or not I'm happy.
Seize the Day...
What I've come to realize, during my withdrawal of social events and special group outings, is that I did a lot of waiting around for people. Waiting for them to text me, make plans, confirm they're available, make a decision on where to get take out, and the like. It's been a bit freeing knowing that I can lay out the plan for the day on my own time and make the most of the day on my own terms.
I've dealt with people who don't follow through, who keep me waiting, who cancel late last minute, while I'm twiddling my fingers. You can't live your life with that BS! Do what you want and you will feel more fulfilled, motivated, and mentally sound knowing that you don't have to wait on other people to make plans with you.
Be Mindful of Your Power
For someone like me who lives with order in their lives and fancies structured plans, I've learned to let go of the control and pressure of knowing that other people are more deserving of my time. It's ultimately up to me to decide how I want to spend it.
I want to disclaim that making plans with people is great and you should never feel guilty giving people the time if you mindfully do so. However, don't give into guilt trips, or people who pressure you into doing things because you'll "regret" it later. Trust your word and don't let other people dictate your time or self-worth because you "just don't feel like it". No one needs an explanation for why your time is just as valuable.
Establish Personal Boundaries
Sometimes I find myself complaining about the things I have to do, but more recently, I've become susceptible to being around people who complain more about what they have to do and why it should matter to me. Sometimes it's not your responsibility to reckon with other people's goals, plans, or conflicts—just stay out of it and keep in your own lane.
We get blindsided by the amount of comparing that we do and most of the time, we don't even know we're doing it. We compare our personal, financial, and professional goals with other people so much that we are dumbfounded by rejection and stoop down to others just so we can doubt our own potential and move on with our lives. Time is precious, so why dwell on other things we can't control?
The truth of it all is that we invest our time in people, so much so, that it consumes our daily lives. Who we work for, who we eat with, who we live with, who we exercise with, and so forth. A simple way of not falling accustomed to letting other people take your time, energy, and power away is to realize that your time is valuable and no one should take advantage of it. Become the driver of your life. Hone your potential, inspired motivation, and start seizing back the control of your life on your own time.
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